Redneck Therapy That Works

Bubba was having problems sleeping at night.  So one day, Bubba went to see a psychiatrist.

When Bubba went to the psychiatrist's office, he said, "Doc, I've got problems.  Every time I go to bed, I think there's somebody under it.  I'm scared.  I think I'm going crazy."

"Just put yourself in my hands for one year," said the psychiatrist.  "Come talk to me three times a week, and we should be able to get rid of those fears."

"How much do you charge?" asked Bubba.

"Eighty dollars per visit," replied the psychiatrist.

"I'll sleep on it," said Bubba.

After that, Bubba left the psychiatrist's office and never returned.

Six months later the psychiatrist met Bubba on the street.

"Why didn't you ever come to see about those fears you were having?" asked the psychiatrist.

Bubba replied, "Well, eighty bucks a visit, three times a week for a year is an awful lot of money.  A bartender cured me for $10.  I was so happy to have saved all that money I went and bought me a new pickup."

"Is that so?" said the psychiatrist.  "And how, may I ask, did a bartender cure you?"

Bubba replied, "He told me to cut the legs off the bed.  Ain't nobody under there now!!!"